Parislog 95
February 13, 2007

Okay, I have been having the worst run of luck in the past month and it is making me positively want to scream.

It took me ages to figure out what I wanted to try my hand at here, photography, and then it took another age for me to get up the courage to work on it. I then worked on getting my portfolio ready and my CV (that is a resume in the USA and Canada). I was feeling extremely scared but I kept slowly moving. I was finally ready with all my ducks in a row.

Then I accidentally destroyed all of my photographs on my computer. It took me over a week to find out how to retrieve the photos. I had not saved the last month and a week of work. That included my photo shoot that is scheduled to come out in two different magazines. I absolutely went into shock when I realized what had happened. Fortunately I eventually found an answer and help through one of my photography buddies here. He loaned me a hard drive and a recovery program. I managed to save all my photos from the missing period. I took over a week of hard work. I was at it for 8 or more hours a day but got it done.

I was then waiting for the final touches on my CV. A friend and her neighbor were helping me make it correct to the French ears. However circumstances were getting in the way of my getting out to her house to work on the final touches. I got there eventually and it was done.Then I got sick. I woke up one morning with a fever and sore throat that turned into a chest thing and then a head cold. It took a week to get past the worst of that and another week to get over the last of it.

By then I was losing my momentum and feeling a little off about getting out there and facing the world. It is so difficult to put yourself onto the job market and even more so when it is your personal art. Then it becomes really personal if they don’t like it. Plus the first step just isn’t easy. You have to break the ice with yourself, period.

So I met up with a friend at the corner bistro and had a glass of wine. She helped me come up with some ideas to get myself moving. I threw away a couple of pieces of clothing that I had been wearing and weren’t flattering. I started to feel better and ready to take the next step.

Saturday, I went to A*’s place and we went for a walk in the park near her house. It was a beautiful day and a beautiful park, or rather woods. I tiptoed across some areas of mud as I had on a pair of pants that were dragging a bit. We went to a movie and then back to her place. I cooked us a spaghetti dinner and then she brought me home. A lovely day.
Sunday morning I woke up with my right foot feeling tight and uncomfortable. I thought to myself that it was the muscles being tight from unaccustomed tiptoeing so I went for a walk to the movie theatre to warm it up and loosen the muscles. Huge mistake because that wasn’t what the problem was. By the time I was heading home, I was ready to scream with every step I took, especially going down the metro stairs. I made it home and once I got off my foot, there was no getting back on it without howling in pain. The foot was swollen on the bottom of the arch and on the outside edge of the foot below the anklebone.
The next day, I took pain medication and aspirin for the swelling and iced it. As the day went on it seemed to be getting better. I was able to very gently put my food down and hobble. That turned out to be a mistake though because by the evening it was bad again.

Today I hopped all day. My friend P* came over in the afternoon and helped me to the pharmacy where I rented crutches and got some more Advil. The pharmacist was concerned that it was broken and suggested that I get an x-ray. I don’t have medical though. She said that the fact that I didn’t feel it happen and because of where the swelling was that it indicated possible breakage. How do you break your foot and not know it? I am going for it being a sprain.

Can this please be the end of the bad luck? I really need to be able to get on the road of looking for a job but it is a little hard to present yourself either sick or hobbling on crutches. Sigh.